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Archie Takes a Bullet

Just your typical American comic book, not


The lamestream media told you:

There is no culture war in America, everything is normal, you can go back to sleep now, there is no cause for alarm, move along, there is nothing to see here.


The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that:

Archie, the classic comic-book symbol of The American Way, teenage angst, growing up with American values of chasing girls, eating ice cream, going to high school, and boys will be boys, has come to an end, but it's not clear who has implemented a marxist revision of our culture. In the July 2014 issue, Archie is put to death, deliberately taking a bullet during a gay rights parade meant to murder his gay friend.

In other news, Marvel comics has decided that Thor will no longer be a man. I'm not making this up.

Thor will now be a woman, complete with shiny metal tits. I kid you not.


NEW THOR


If this is not a rewrite of our culture it is hard to imagine what would be. The real question, unanswered at press time, is what heathen low-life bottom-feeding enemy of American life got their hands on the controls and could do this to the literature our innocent impressionable youth read?

According to leading experts, the problem is with me, not the news reported here.

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About the Author

  • Freelance writer Alan Korwin is a founder and past president of the Arizona Book Publishing Association. With his wife Cheryl he operates Bloomfield Press, the largest producer and distributor of gun-law books in the country. Here writing as "The Uninvited Ombudsman," Alan covers the day's stories as they ought to read. Read more.

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